Body Pump with Kamesha - She warned me she was bringing her game face (January 8, 2015)

Everyone says it is a small world, but I think that is a gross understatement.  The world is basically a tiny nugget.  Just ask that former coworker you hated that is now dating your cousin, or that weird guy you went on one date with three years ago who now works three cubicles away from you.  I am not sure if it is due to overcrowding or the internet, but the degrees of separation have dwindled down to roughly two (sorry, Kevin Bacon). This small world is how I ended up in Kamesha's Body Pump class.

In 2009, I was too old to be going on spring break, but too young to realize that was the case. Luckily, I had some good company.  Myself and a few other fine gals decided to go on a cruise to the Bahamas.  My friend Marisa brought her friend Kamesha.

The first day on the ship, I was on the elevator with my friend Gabby.  I noticed two kids wearing JMU t-shirts.  I, being friendly, said hello and mentioned that I went to JMU.  They asked when I graduated, and I told them.  One kid turned to his friend and said "dude, we were in middle school."  He was attempting to whisper, but he was drunk, so it was more likely a voice-crackling bellow.  My friend Gabby just looked at him and said, "you realize that we can hear you?"  Anyhow, that is when I learned I was too old for spring break (in other small world news, that whisper failing kid went on to marry my dear friend's youngest sister...seriously world...grow a little).

Despite being old enough to babysit the rest of the ship, the trip was a good time.  Like most random people you spring break with, Kamesha and I became Facebook friends, and we passed along like ships in the night.  At that time, I lived in Williamsburg, Virginia, and she lived somewhere in Maryland.

Fast forward a few years.  I am not sure who was Facebook stalking who, but I think it had something to do with Kristin's wedding picture on Facebook.  Either my friend Kristin, who lives in Rockville, mentioned that she thought I knew her fitness instructor, or maybe Kamesha messaged me asking if I knew her student.  I can't remember at this point, but either way, Kristin, my dear friend from middle school, was taking Kamesha's fitness classes at Gold's Gym (apparently, Kamesha had become a fitness instructor since we did our cruising).  They became friendly, and everyone kind of reconnected.

Now that you've had your history lesson, I will get into Body Pump.  I have wanted to take a class with Kamesha for quite some time, so I was very excited to take her Thursday evening Body Pump class.   Kristin was wonderful enough to let me be her guest at the Rockville Gold's Gym.

I walk into the gym, and I see Kristin and another instructor, Jody. Jody informs me that Kamesha is a terrifying instructor.  That made me a little nervous.  I have seen Kamesha's arms.  I knew she didn't get that strong screwing around, but I hoped that her muscle was not from crushing her students.

Kamesha was teaching a Les Mills Body Pump class. I love Les Mills classes. Les Mills always hires awesome instructors (like Kamesha), and the classes provide a regimented and efficient workout.  They also change up their routines every few weeks so that you don't get bored. Here is the description of Body Pump:  http://www.lesmills.com/workouts/fitness-classes/bodypump/

Kamesha told me before class that she was bringing her game face.  I suspect that she brings her game face every day.   Her class was packed wall-to-wall on a snowy day.  People were out in Arctic temperatures to work out with her!  You know you are a great instructor when people will drag themselves out after a long workday in the cold and darkness.  We grabbed our tools: a step, a weight lifting bar, a mat and some weight plates.  Time to get started!

I was confident that Kamesha would kick my ass, but I had no idea she would kick it so hard.  After chest presses and push-ups (so. many. push ups.), my chest was literally shaking, which was also impressive in itself because there is very little chest to shake.  In addition chest presses, we worked a little bit of everything else.  We did clean and presses, dead lifts, lunges, squats, etc.  Kamesha both worked out with us and talked us through the various exercises in great detail.  This helped us maintain appropriate form, which always makes for a better workout. Kamesha also intermittently sang her pretty stellar play list. She was only slightly scary, and only in that perfect instructor kind of way.  She wasn't so scary that you felt discouraged or intimidated.  She was just scary enough that you didn't want to disappoint her.  I am sure this perfect balance is one of the reasons that she has such a loyal following.

Of note, Kristin was on the other side of me banging out push-ups, and not on your knees push-ups like myself, like body builder push-ups.  Seriously, Kristin, are you human?  I guess she has taken Kamesha's class enough time to also have kick ass upper body strength.

I wish I lived closer to Kamesha's class.  I could take it every week, and then I would probably be able to perform feats of strength such as opening spaghetti sauce or moving my dog off of my spot in the bed.  Unfortunately, I do not, but I am very appreciative that I got a great workout in with Kamesha and Kristin.  Kamesha, thank you for being scary good at teaching fitness classes.  Kristin, thank you for letting me be your weak date.

Soul Cycle - Yasmeen and I ride the Wayne train (December 30, 2014)

For Christmas this year, my fabulous friend and former college roommate, Yasmeen, purchased me a Soul Cycle class.  I knew very little about Soul Cycle prior to taking this class.  I assumed that it involved cycling, and once while flipping through a grocery store tabloid, I saw a picture of Bradley Cooper leaving
Soul Cycle.  Stars, their just like us; however, this was the extent of my Soul Cycle knowledge.  Bikes + Bradley Cooper = Soul Cycle. If you would like a more accurate description, here is the website: https://www.soul-cycle.com/

Soul Cycle is located in New York, LA, and some other big cities, but it just recently made it to DC.  It is conveniently located near Yasmeen's apartment, so it was a perfect way to spend a Monday evening.  

It was not Yasmeen's first rodeo with Soul Cycle, so she took care of scheduling the class.  There were a lot of details involved in scheduling.  We would be cycling with Wayne, and his play list was going to be hard rap and R&B, and we would be on bikes #26 and #27.   I didn't realize we were assigned specific bikes, or that we could choose our class based on the song play list.  We arrived at our 8:30 class, and they asked us if we needed to rent shoes.  Your shoe rental is free for your first class (your first class is not free).  After your first class, you must rent shoes for $3.  Prior to Soul Cycle, I had never used cycling shoes.  I find the idea of being strapped to bike pedals scary, so this was an unsettling start.  As we waited for the class to start, Yasmeen started discussing the push-ups and free weights involved.  What?  I was so confused.  Bike push-ups, weights?


Wayne started wandering through the hall outside the cycle studio yelling that was time to "ride the Wayne Train."  Kudos to Wayne for an awesome slogan.  I am sure he uses that line outside of Soul Cycle. We entered the cycling room.  You may have noticed if you read other posts that I try to take pictures for this blog, but it doesn't always work out.  I learned that you cannot take pictures in Soul Cycle. Luckily, I was a few pictures deep before the picture police shut me down.  You can see the serious cycling shoes that I rented in the picture.

On an aside, Yasmeen and I aren't sure why you cannot take pictures in the Soul Cycle studio.  Rather than ask, we decided to speculate, and we concluded that it is probably the Kardashians' fault.  People probably try to take pictures of them in LA or NYC when they cycle.  You might say this is really the fault of those people who want the pictures and to invade their privacy by taking the pictures while they are just trying to cycle.  Please, don't over think it.   Our theory is complete conjecture, but when all else fails, it never hurts to blame the Kardashians. Plus,it is DC.  There are no Kardashians - just disgruntled government workers and GW students.

Soul Cycle was a one-of-a-kind experience.  The class was more like being in a dance club, and the instructor was more like a DJ.  The music was incredibly loud, and I know that makes me sound like an old person yelling at kids from my front porch, but it was just too loud; however, this is my only complaint with Soul Cycle.

Wayne previously worked as both a DJ and a kick boxing instructor.  Wayne liked to say things like "little known fact..." and fill then in the blank.  I think Wayne was playing fast and loose with the term "little known fact," but it was nice to learn more about him.  The lights are off for the bulk of the class, with the exception of some blinking lights and candles.  Certain lights would blink to the beat.  The candles, well, I suppose they were meant to support the hard-rap ambiance?

I quickly learned why we were strapped into the bike by our shoes.  We were expected to "dance" on the bikes, which consisted of rocking back and forth, both side to side and front to back, to the beat of the music. We were also expected to do bike push-ups to the rhythm of the music.  The music was too fast for me to do push-ups to the beat, but I tried my best.  A bike push-up involves doing a push-up while sitting on the bike and hinging at your waist down onto the handlebars.  If you cannot picture the move, just Google bike push-up.  There are a few YouTube videos.  Needless to say, had I not been strapped in, I absolutely would have fallen off.

The class was 45 minutes, which is about 15 minutes shorter than cycling classes that I have taken in the past, but I did not feel short-changed on the workout.   Wayne really pushed us.  He was both a great DJ and a very supportive instructor.  When he wasn't bellowing "Yeahhh," like he was Lil Jon, he was saying supportive things like, "we are all in this together," which may be a little dramatic for a exercise class, but it was very encouraging.  He also did the entire workout with the class, which I always really appreciate.  It makes me feel more engaged because the instructor seems more engaged.  It meant more to me when Wayne said we were all on one team because he was on the bike in front of me doing the same workout (well, he was probably doing a much better version of the same workout).

There were a lot of bike push-ups, but not a lot of free weight action.  The free weight portion was maybe 5-7 minutes towards the end of the class.  There was a set of two-pound free weights under each seat for easy access.  We did a lot of bicep curls and arm raises.  I probably would have preferred more free weight exercises and fewer push-ups, but that is just personal preference.  It was a fantastic abdominal workout to do the arm lifts while maintaining a sitting position and peddling.  It may not sound difficult, but it was incredibly challenging.

I would do this workout again, but probably not make it a regular activity,  The workout is pricey.  I am sure that is why Soul Cycle is located in big cities and boasts some celebrity participation.  I am already a member of a gym that offers cycling classes.  Although my class lacks Wayne, candles and strobe lights, I can survive without those unique amenities.  I would definitely take a Soul Cycle class every once in a while.  The class was a fantastic workout and a ton of fun.  It was nice to be in a class that integrated other workout elements into the basic cycling.  It made the class go by faster, and it felt like more of a full body workout.  Thank you, Yasmeen,for the amazing Christmas present.  You know me too well.

PS, speaking of Bradley Cooper, here is a picture of him peddling ice cream in Cape Town, South Africa.  I always laugh when I am in other countries and serious American celebrities are promoting mundane products (no disrespect Haagen-Dazs).  This gave me a solid giggle.

Step Sculpt - I think it is safe to say we all phoned it in (December 27, 2014)

I am a big believer that going to the gym and having a crappy workout is still better than not going to the gym at all.  It is the whole "at least I showed up" rationale.  I am particularly proud when I show up around the holidays.  By the December 27th of this year, I had spent three days eating and drinking delicious items, which makes me want to sleep much more than it makes me want to workout.

My dear friend, Ulli (she is the blond below...the blond that isn't me...I'm in the middle), and I spent Christmas and the day after Christmas together.  Ulli is German and an awesome cook.  Among other things, she made an awesome German apple cake, cheese-stuffed dates, and bread pudding.  She also introduced me to Gluhwein, which is a delicious German mulled wine.  Needless to say, after a few days filled with these treats, and some late night games with friends, I was incredibly satisfied with myself just for attending Step Sculpt.

 I arrived bright and early to Step Sculpt, beaming with pride (or from a bread pudding high) because I had made it just under the wire to accomplish my new workout for the week.  Unfortunately, my instructor did not seem nearly as impressed that I showed up. There was a lot brewing in my stomach, and my pride buzz was about to get killed.

Step Sculpt is exactly what it sounds like.  You step for the first half of class, and then you lift weights, or "sculpt," for the second half of class.  Step class, like most classes that require rhythm, is not my forte.   I do better with hitting bags or lifting things, not remembering patterns.  I am this way across the board in life.  For example, I am that bridesmaid in the wedding that is asked to lift cases of wine or set up tables at the bridal shower.  I am never assigned crafts or dainty tasks.

The instructor was not happy with the entire class.  She wasn't nasty or anything, but most instructors say things like "Great job," or "Keep it up," even when everyone is struggling with the class.  This instructor was much more honest.  She yelled super-enthusiastic things like "that is fine," and "can you please pay attention?" At one point she said,"please just watch what I am doing for 60 more seconds, and then you can go back to going through the motions."  I don't think she was speaking directly to me, but to be fair, I wasn't really paying attention to who she was talking to.  I was wandering around the step in the wrong direction while looking at everyone's sneakers.  I need to buy a new pair, and I have a bit of a thing for shoes.  I cannot help it.  There was another girl in the back row with me who was just periodically stretching and drinking water, so I think comparatively I looked extremely attentive.

I did much better during the lifting portion - back to my basic skills.  We did chest presses, push-ups, triceps dips, and lunges, among other things.

According to the internet, you can burn up to 500 calories doing Step Sculpt.  I am going to assume that I did not burn 500 due to my periodic wandering off and skipping steps, but I still burned more calories that I would have burned if I had stayed in bed sleeping and digesting Ulli's baked goods.  I am a big fan of this new craze of combination workouts.  Depending on what you choose, you may get the opportunity to go outside your comfort zone, which is step class in my case, but also do a workout that you're more comfortable with for part of the class.

Although my instructor did not understand what a personal victory it was for me to show up to class, I am still happy with myself.  You should always be happy with yourself if you exercise.  I will probably give Step Sculpt another shot, but not after a late night of Cards Against Humanity and delicious treats.

Because I have no pictures from Step Sculpt, I included this extra shot of the very weird roll of tape I noticed in my office the other day.  For the record, there is nothing about my job that would lead a person to believe they were headed for a land of sunshine.  I can only assume a hippie broke into my office and taped fortunes from fortune cookies to various office supplies.

My night with a personal trainer - Call me ma'am (December 15, 2014)

I recently joined a new gym.  As many people who join gyms know, you usually get a free personal training session with your new membership.  I always take my free session because I like learning new exercises; however, this free session offered me so much more than new exercises.  This session offered me Jon.

Jon is a 20-year-old who had been a personal trainer for all of two weeks when I met him. A little back story on Jon.  He got into personal training because he is involved in fitness competitions.  I asked him if he meant competitions like Crossfit.  He said "No.  My competitions focus on being more aesthetically pleasing."  Well, at least Jon didn't beat around the bush.

Jon started his script.  "Alright ma'am, what are your goals?"  Well, my first goal was not to be called ma'am until I was a grandmother, but you already shit on that goal.  Great start, Jon.  Unfortunately for Jon, my other goal is to not go to his gym at least one day a week (remember the purpose of this blog).  I said that I would probably just like the usual generic things that all woman say, tighter butt, more toned thighs, and I like to generally maintain good health.  I watched him write on the paper "woman things."  Then Jon asked, "on a scale from one to ten, how committed are you to achieving your fitness goals?"  Me: "Probably a 5."  Jon: "Why only a 5?"  Jon was killing me at that point.  Just circle the number so we can move along.

After the questionnaire, Jon moved on to some preliminary fitness tests.  Jon: "You're in excellent shape for your age."  To be clear, I am 30. I am not Methuselah.  Me: "Thanks, Jon."

As I have previously mentioned, I have the upper body strength of a small child.  My fitness assessments always go the same way.  Everything goes pretty well, and then I am given either a push-up or a pull-up test.  That goes so poorly that the rest of the session is dedicated to my upper body.  Today was no different, but now Jon had a new goal for me.  He announced that I should put on 10 pounds of muscle, with at least two pounds in each of  my shoulders.  Jon also informs me that all of the Victoria's Secret models have really ripped shoulders.  When I asked him how much time he spent focusing on their shoulders, he backed away from that sales pitch.  I have included a picture of a Victoria's Secret model...Please, stop ogling her shoulders.

Remember how Jon competes? Well, he certainly didn't want me to forget.  While I was doing my overhead presses, Jon told me about his website.  Then, I guess in case I never got around to the website, Jon decided to whip out his phone to start showing me topless pictures. I have included a picture for your viewing pleasure.  Don't worry, I did get around to the website (hence how I obtained the picture), and I even forced it on my poor co-worker.  Someone else had to see what I could not un-see.  I think for the purpose of this post, the visual really helps you understand who and what I was dealing with on my fine Monday night.

To be fair to Jon, the session was awesome.  He had me do a lot of overhead presses and reverse flyes.  Jon also had me do super sets, which is basically when you do not take breaks in between sets - you hustle from one set to the next.  I had a spectacular shoulder workout (VS will probably catch wind of my shoulders and start calling me any day now).  In addition to a lot of new free weight and cable exercises for my shoulders, he also gave me a solid abdominal workout.  For one of the abdominal exercises, Jon tossed my legs while I held his ankles.  I love this ab exercise, and it isn't really one that I feel okay asking strangers to help me with at the gym, so I was grateful when Jon suggested it.  If you have a gym buddy, please do this exercise.  Your abs will thank you (after they hate you).

Anyhow, I recommend using those free personal training sessions anytime you get them.  It is nice to have a professional figure out what you need to work on and give you some fresh ideas.  It is an added bonus if he or she shows you topless internet pics.

A note for the holidays - I had my session with Jon on the 15th, but sometimes I don't get around to my posts until the weekend.  Today is actually the 21st.  I started Christmas shopping today.  I love it.

This afternoon, I watched a man frantically purchase a blow-up Hello Kitty lawn ornament in Wal-Mart.  Why?  Because it is December 21st, and he has absolutely no idea what to do.  Following Wal-Mart, I wandered over to Home Goods.  I was not planning to purchase any home goods, but I just wanted to watch the madness.  Home Goods did not disappoint.

See the picture of that 10 ft, tall stuffed giraffe.  That giraffe is $600.  As soon as I walked into the store that couple next to the giraffe had this conversation.  Woman: "Do you think we should get her that stuffed giraffe?" Man: "That could probably fit in our truck."  If that conversation happened on, let's say, November 30th, the conversation would sound more like this.  Woman: "Do you think we should get her that stuffed giraffe."  Man: "What the fuck is she going to do with a 10 ft. tall, $600 stuffed giraffe?" Woman: "You're right, I must be drunk.  That is a terrible idea."

On December 21st, that giraffe is getting in their truck.

Although I enjoy watching people make terrible shopping decisions, and I decorated my Christmas tree while listening to Serial (so addicting), I am actually quite into the holiday spirit.  With that, I want to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas, or a merry anything else you celebrate
.

Cardio Kickboxing - When Instructors Attack (December 13, 2014)

So, after returning from Africa, I was kind of playing catch-up.  I didn't have a lot of time to seek out anything too strange for lucky week 13. I opted for cardio kickboxing at my gym on the lovely morning of 12/13/14.  Of note, December 13 was my husband's 30th birthday.  I don't have any pictures from my workout, so I have just included some from his birthday.  I assume looking at pictures that don't make sense is better than looking at no pictures at all.

I was very excited when I got to the cardio kickboxing class.  There were a ton of people.  A crowded class can be annoying, but it is often a sign of a good class.  I counted over 50 people.  The variety was also something to behold.  The Zumba instructor from the class before stuck around.  I couldn't begin to guess her age.  She looked like a Real Housewife of Somewhere who just got done a fresh touch-up under the knife.  There was the guy who kept wandering in and out of the class in jeans, a t-shirt and a zip up fleece vest.  Next to the Zumba instructor, he was clearly the next best one to watch.  There was also a healthy mix of men and women, and people of all ages, shapes and sizes.  The room was very large, so it actually accommodated everyone, which was a nice surprise.  The aerobic room is located next to the pool, and the wall between the pool and the aerobics room is actually a window.  This provided another "participant" of sorts - an old man who sat in the pool and watched the class.  At first, I thought this was creepy, but as the class went along, I could see why he wanted to watch the show.  I guess it didn't make him less creepy, but at least it sort of validated his creepy.

The instructor was in fantastic shape.  I have a suspicion she is current or former military because in addition to be in fantastic shape, she gave her instructions like a drill sergeant.  She also started yelling "It will either be you or the enemy."  Me or the enemy? What? When? I am just trying to do some air punches to burn off birthday cake.  No enemy here (well, I guess the birthday cake).  This statement was followed by "your muscles will remember these moves so your natural reflex becomes to destroy the enemy."  In my head I thought, okay, the screaming about the enemy seems a bit aggressive, but the workout is great so far.

Sometimes in kickboxing, the instructors will walk around with a glove on their hand and encourage the students to punch the glove.  The instructor of this class decided to walked around and let people punch her palm.  I have never seen this.  No padding, just attack her hand.

Class rolled on.  At one point, she determined that our kicks were not adequate.  She yelled, "He is going to grab your leg, flip you over, and you are going to end up on the 5 o'clock news."  The room filled with some of the most nervous/awkward laughter that I have ever heard.  We are about two-thirds of the way through the class at this point.  The instructor decided that we needed to know just how we were going to get attacked.  She grabbed the head of a girl in the row in front of me and told the girl to try and punch her because otherwise her neck would get snapped.  I moved farther back in the room,

The instructor then moved on to a gentleman in the class.  We were doing burpees at this point, and she started grabbing for his knees to throw him on his back.  She succeeded.  She said that was to demonstrate the importance of the burpee.   I didn't really need to know the purpose.  I was happy just to blindly comply with the instruction.  In case you don't know, this is a burpee: http://www.wikihow.com/Do-a-Burpee  Thanks, WikiHow.

The instructor also ran to the corner of the room at one point to demonstrate how to punch out of a corner for "when the enemy has you trapped in a confined space."

Other than being frightening, the class was a great workout.  The name absolutely captured the class - there was a solid amount of cardio, kicking and boxing.  Additionally, I learned how I am supposed to kick a car door into someone if they are coming at me in my car, and I also learned how to smash a skull and snap a neck.  I absolutely appreciate that the instructor is trying to make women more safe and strong.  I think that is a fantastic goal; however, I would probably save some of her more aggressive commentary, such as how I am going to make it on the news due to my pathetic kicks, for an actual self defense class.

It was not the workout that I was expecting nestled between my morning latte and my Target run.  I will probably go back...because otherwise she might yell at me.

Hippo tracking and other ways to exercise (or terrify yourself) on vacation in Africa (the first week in December)

I was fortunate enough to spend 10 days in Africa at the beginning of December.  It may sound cliche, but it was truly the trip of a lifetime.  The flying time is 20+ hours each way, so I was very anxious to find some ways to exercise when I landed.  Africa did not disappoint  I will keep my commentary brief, since the real fun is looking at the pictures!

Hippo Tracking - I call this adventure hippo tracking, but it was technically a bush hike.  After two days of doing long morning and evening game drives, I remembered that our guide mentioned "bush hikes," which were basically safaris on foot.  I expressed interest in this activity on behalf of the group (admittedly, without group consent).  In hindsight, I don't know what I was thinking.  We had just spent two days looking for (and finding) a number of deadly animals.  These animals were intimidating from the comfort of an open air Land Rover.  Why in the world would we want to see them on foot?

Our "bush hike" started when our guide, CJ, stopped our Land Rover in the middle of no where and instructed us to get out and start walking.  We laughed because we assumed he was joking.  He was not joking.

CJ brought a gun with him, but this actually was a joke.  We were on a game preserve. There would be no shooting any animals.  In fact, two days earlier, another guide was chased up a tree by 9 lions and he had to wait it out until he was rescued by a Land Rover.  The gun looked like a Civil War reenactment gun, and it had 3 bullets.  That brings me to my second point.  Even if the gun functioned, the bullet to creature ratio was not in our favor (see 9 lions referenced above).

Anyhow, we started walking through the dense bush.  We probably walked for a little over an hour. It was hard to keep track of time with my heart beating out of my chest.  Interestingly, a large portion of the walk involved scrutinizing animal shit.  I can now distinguish between elephant, rhino, and hippo feces.  I am not sure how to weave that skill into my LinkedIn profile, but I can address that isse at a later date.

We noticed hippo footprints and poop, which appeared fresh.  Suddenly, we heard something down near the water (that I thought sounded like a lion roar because I apparently missed the lesson on animal sounds as a toddler).  Off we went.  As we quietly approached the water, our guide began to tell us that hippos kill more people in Africa than any other animal.  Super comforting.   My husband spotted some air bubbles, and shortly after that, we spotted a large school of hippos!   After spotting the hippos, we quickly left.  The hippos were all giving us the stink eye, and after the whole "deadliest animal" speech, lingering seemed like a poor choice.

On our way back to the Land Rover, the guide told us a story about how when he was a child he used to harass hippos using a red cape (I'm picturing a matador) in order to get the hippos to chase him.  Then he would run and jump over a log because a hippo cannot jump over a log due to their small legs.  The game ended with him laughing and taunting a very pissed off hippo on the other side of a log.  Some 40 years later, the guide still got a solid laugh from his own antics.  I came to two conclusions after hearing his story.  One, I hope there is no kind of bad karma that comes from messing with hippos, or CJ is screwed.  Second,  I wish CJ had shared the whole log trick prior to finding the hippos.  That may have quelled some fears as we approached a school of the deadliest animals in Africa.

I am not sure if it was the walking through the terrain or the fear, but this activity definitely raised my heart rate.

On a side note, I included the rhino pic because there is a terrible rhino poaching problem in Africa.  I know everyone has a cause, but in case you lack one and want to do some type of good (other than probably dumping ice on your head), you can check out this website.  http://www.savetherhino.org/



Gorge hiking Victoria Falls - Victoria Falls, which is located in Zimbabwe, offered a number of great activities.  One that was of particular interest to myself was a gorge hike down Victoria Falls.  I mentioned this activity to our group, and my husband and my mother were both very interested.  We were told  that you should be pretty fit to partake in the hike, but we were all assured by the guide that we would have no problem completing the hike.

After taking a boat to a bus, and then a bus to the gorge, we were at the top of Victoria Falls.  Of note, the first thing I did was fall off of the bus.  That did not leave me brimming with confidence.

That picture to the left  is what we hiked.  Once we got to the bottom, we had to row through the water, climb over the rocks towards the pool that sat beneath the falls.  Once we reached the pool, we were free to swim (you know, with all that spare energy). I think telling us we needed to be somewhat fit was an understatement.

In addition to being a tough workout, it was also a scary workout.  The safety standards in Zimbabwe are different from the United States.  Part of our hike was literally climbing a ladder down the side of the gorge...but there were no hand rails.  On the way down, we had to do this climb while carrying a paddle (for the row below).  At other times, we were walking on a ledge that was about 12 inches wide...again, no railing.  After reaching the bottom and rowing to the falls, we had to climb over that very large pile of rocks, which were slippery from being wet.

Our guide explained that there was no trail because the water levels change every day, making it impossible to take the same path twice.  He called us pioneers.  By the time we reached the pool, I had fallen a lot, so I didn't want to pioneer anything; however, it was totally worth it when we reached the bottom of the falls.  We were able to swim, but  I use the term swim loosely.  My husband swam, but by that point, I had fallen into the pool, and I just opted to float around in my life jacket because I knew we were going to have to row back and then climb back up the gorge.

I must note that my mother was a rock star.  I was quite worried about her when I realized the physical intensity of our little gorge adventure.  It is funny how when you hit your late 20s/early 30s, the parent/child relationship reverses.   You start to worry about your parents doing dangerous things, and as long as you remain gainfully employed, your parents aren't nearly as concerned about what you do.

Horse back riding along the Zambezi River - I grew up on a horse farm, but ironically, there is a huge misconception that I dislike horses.  I believe this is largely because I do not ride them.  I have nothing against riding or horses.  I just have very particular criteria that no horse can actually meet.  I only want a horse that never goes too fast, never jumps in the air, is self cleaning, and has a side job to pay for its own room and board.  I think that is reasonable.

Anyhow, my mom loves riding, and I like horseback riding on vacation because vacation horses tend to meet all of my horse criteria.  The horses are usually slow, don't jump, and I am free of any responsibility to the horse as soon as I get off at the end of the ride.   My mother and I decided to ride along the Zambezi river, which separates Zimbabwe and Zambia.  See the picture of the sunset - gorgeous.


The ride began with a safety lecture from the guide regarding what to do in the event of an elephant stampede.  Apparently, there was a new baby in the local herd, and the elephants were rather protective.  In the event of a stampede, we were instructed to grab our horse's neck and hold, and the horse would run away, knowing how to get back to the farm.   I'm sure the guide gave this lecture everyday and no one ever said anything, but I felt the whole death by stampede conversation required some follow-up questions.    Isn't this putting a lot of faith in my horse?  I just met my horse!  How often were these alleged elephant attacks?   An elephant is still much larger than a horse.  Has this strategy ever actually produced a good result?

The safety instructor also showed us the symbol for turn around and run (again, not encouraging).  My pony had awfully stumpy legs, which was my original preference wanting a slow, non-jumping creature; however, slow, non-jumping creatures probably can't outrun attack elephants  Do I decide to upgrade to a real horse?  A real horse might go faster, and if I fell off, I would be falling a lot farther, but again, you know, the elephant issue.  Decisions, decisions.

I decided to stick with my little bush pony; however, I let her stop to eat whenever she wanted. In the event of an elephant attack, I wanted her to both have sufficient energy and to remember how much she liked the person on her back for allowing her to eat constantly.

The ride was a great way to get a different perspective of the animals.  While you're on horseback, the animals let you get much closer because they see you as another animal. For example, we got right in the mix of a herd of roughly 100 Cape Buffalo.  It was both frightening and amazing (much like many of the trip activities).   We could not cover as much ground to see as many animals because we could not go as fast as a Land Rover - especially when you opt for a walk-only pony who you allow to treat the land as her personal buffet,

 Luckily, we did not run across any elephants, so I did not have to see how fast my pony could move her little stumps.  Here is a link with some stats on the calories burned working with horses.  http://www.ultimatehorsesite.com/info/caloriesburned.html  I always feel like riding is a great abdominal workout. It also works your legs and arms...assuming you're instructing your horse to do something and not just allowing her to do whatever it wants in order to avoid death by elephant.

Gabby's Gobble 5k - Invading Kristin's Thanksgiving (November 27, 2014)

Kristin and I have been the best of friends for dangerously close to 20 years (I seriously don't know how we are old enough to say that).  We are lucky enough to live near each other in the DC metro area, but that does not stop us from also seeing each other when we are back in our home state of Delaware for the holidays (obviously - true love - can't get enough of each other).

At some point in October we were discussing our upcoming Thanksgiving plans,  Kristin mentioned that she would be running a 5k with her younger sister, Haley.  It was going to be Haley's first 5k!  Naturally, I took this special sister moment, and I invited myself to participate.  I believe a touchstone for true friendship is the ability to blatantly intrude on precious family moments.

I was very excited to run with Kristin and Haley!

First, I have never had the opportunity to run a race with Kristin.  When I say run with Kristin, I mean "run with" Kristin in a more theoretical way.  We would run in the same race, but she runs much faster than myself (I would describe it as road runner-esque).
Second, Haley is super cool.  I do not spend a lot of time with 12 year old kids, because that would be weird since I am not a middle school teacher.  Other than both of us being outside the target demographic of the Juniors' department at the mall, we would have little in common; however, Haley is an exception.  She is one fantastic kid (tween?).  I like to think it is because she has a ton of awesome role models, but given that her awesomeness surpasses all of ours, I think it is a result of nature, not nurture.  I still remember Haley's epic dance moves from  Kristin's wedding.

Gabby's Gobble 5k was held in Lewes, Delaware, which is an adorable beach town. Who doesn't want to run in an adorable beach town? One of the many reasons that I love running races is that most races are raising money for an incredibly worthy cause, and this race was no exception.   Our race benefited the Get Well Gabby Foundation, which raises money to find a cure for childhood brain cancer.  If you're interested, check out the organization  at http://getwellgabby.org/about-us/our-mission/

I have noticed a special energy among both the runners and the volunteers during races that benefit cancer and at the military races in DC area.  I really encourage participating in these races, or any race that benefits a worthy cause, in some way.  It will give you a fantastic case of hopefulness.


It was a chilly morning, but Kristin, Haley, Kristin's father and brother, myself, and my mother pinned on our numbers and headed to the start.  Did I mention that I invited my mother to participate?  If I am going to impose, I am not going to half ass it.

In honor of Thanksgiving,  some people were dressed as turkeys.  My favorite "turkeys" were the people who were wrapped in aluminum foil...leftover turkey.  In hindsight, we should have made family costumes, but maybe next year.

Kristin ran with her dad, and Haley was nice enough to let me run with her.  Haley rocked the 3.1 miles, as I suspected she would.  The race started and finished at Irish Eye's in Lewes.  The post-race goodies included Bloody Marys and hot dogs (aka, the breakfast of champions).  My mother asked if she could have a mimosa.  I had to explain to her that 5ks are not open bars.

The race was a fantastic way to start a day full of eating.  I felt refreshed and energized when I arrived at my in-law's house for Thanksgiving.  I have a lot of in-laws, and they are all great cooks.  When I say a lot, I am not talking 10 or 12.   For the first few years I dated my husband, relatives just kept coming out of the woodwork at family functions.  For a while, I thought it was some sort of weird test just to see how many names I could remember.  Turns out they are genuinely all related, but we are getting off topic.

I definitely think the Gabby's Gobble 5k should become a Hansen, Ward, Thompson, Lands, Brown family tradition.  The race was a blast and went off nicely, especially considering it was the inaugural year.  I can't wait to see what Kristin is doing for Christmas.  I will make sure my stocking is hung by her family's chimney with care.

Kristin and Haley, thank you so much for letting me get in on your Thanksgiving Day action.  You two are the best.