FO Fitness - A sensory overlaod (October 15, 2014)

I have a problem with purchasing LivingSocial deals and Groupons.  I have tried to quit, but I just cannot resist.   I can only purchase so many monogrammed necklaces and photo books, so I usually go for the gym classes!

On an aside, I do not purchase massages from either of these sites, and I encourage you to also resist that temptation.  If you plan on having a stranger touch you while you're naked in a confined space, please pay full price.  This is not limited to massages.  No one has ever boasted about their fantastic discount prostitute experience or those perfect breast implants they got in a Mexican hotel. Pay full price under those circumstances.  However, as I said, go nuts with the workouts!  (That was my PSA)

As I mentioned in the title, this was a sensory overload.  FO Fitness is located in what I think is a strip mall in Alexandria?  It was hard to tell because I got there after dark, and the only thing that was really lit up in the parking lot was the adjoining Cigar Palace (cigars, synonymous with  "good workout").

When I walked into the gym there was a guy in a lot of black Under Armour. You know that guy - head-to-toe spandex because otherwise you might miss how extremely jacked he is.  The gym was pretty bare bones, as evidenced by the picture.  I couldn't get any other pictures, so I included a picture of my sweet comic strip workout pants.  My husband is not a fan, but they are awesome.

I have no problem with a gym that lacks bells and whistles.  I find that sometimes it is actually an indicator of a better workout because the gym and trainers are getting right to the point.  They don't need to dress things up.  It is kind of a like a dive bar.  You just need the drinks and the good company for a good night - no frills.   The workout room was also tiny, so I knew there was no hiding behind any of the fellow attendants.  At that point, I had one of those "oh, shit" moments because I realized that my Wednesday night was going to be more intense than expected.

The ten of us followed the spandex-ed man (oh, did I mention he was wearing a beanie, naturally) into the workout room, and the music started...Katy Perry's California Girls started blaring, and the man in the spandex started doing his only little jig to KP.  I was totally confused.  Did I completely misread this situation?

I did not.   Despite working out the entire class to Katy Perry's greatest hits, the workout was very difficult.  The workout was done in a bootcamp format at a fast pace.  For example, we carried 30-pound weights up and down stairs while our partner did a series of wind sprints, and then we switched places.  We also took turns holding our partner's ankles while they tossed our legs 100 times for ab work, and then we switched.  This leads me to an important point - the entire workout involved pairs.  I liked this because this pushed me.  There was no way I was going to tell the linebacker-esque woman tossing my legs that it was starting to hurt.  I had to suck it up and hope that "I Kissed A Girl" could push me through the pain.

Aside from the gym being...well, unexpected, I received a solid workout.   However,  they could invest in some fresh equipment.  They have everything you could need, but their benches are a little torn up, and we will just say the mats look a bit...vintage.  I'm pretty sure they were once yellow?

Though I was slightly befuddled by the mix of spandex, KP, and the Cigar Palace, I would return...if only not to waste my Living Social deal...and to get my ass kicked by a lady linebacker.

MetroBarre - 1 inch is not 6 inches (October 12, 2014)

This week my workout adventure took place at a local "arts center" near my house.   My very sweet friend, Laura, was my victim this week.  She is always a trooper about trying things at the gym with me, and this week MetroBarre was on the docket.  Thank you, Laura.

I have participated in barre classes in the past, which I will discuss someday, but MetroBarre is a little different.

I actually asked the instructor to explain the difference between MetroBarre and traditional barre (not being an ass, just a genuine question).  The instructor explained that she mixed together all of her favorite workouts - barre, yoga and dance.  Basically, MetroBarre is different because the instructor can do whatever she wants.

The description online gives you a better idea of what the class entails: http://metropolitanarts.org/adult-dance-fitness/metrobarre/

 Barre workouts generally involve using light weights and squishy balls (see pictures) to perform very small movements. We are talking one-inch small. The MetroBarre instructor has a joke that she likes to say if you move too much.  "Oh, you think one inch is six inches?  Isn't your husband lucky."  Seriously, that joke never gets old.

These tiny movements are designed to tone your arms, legs, abs and butt (basically, every place you want tighter and lifted).  I think barre workouts are amazing and extremely hard.  MetroBarre is no exception.

 Even though she had no previous experience, Laura appeared to have a knack for MetroBarre.  These pictures are us just screwing around in the studio.  As you can see, even screwing around Laura still looks pretty graceful.  I, on the other hand, look like a mildly deranged bowler.

The only downfall to the very vague parameters of the MetroBarre class is that you are never quite sure what you are going to be doing.  For example, I described the class to Laura as involving tiny movements and yoga stretching, but tonight the instructor decided to incorporate mountain climbers.  I don't mind mountain climbers, but they don't really fall into the yoga, dance, or barre category.

Regardless, Laura and I had fun.  I am a big proponent of barre, especially MetroBarre. I like that they spice things up by incorporating some dance and yoga...and mountain climbers, and my ass always feels a little higher after I leave the class.  That feeling is probably just in my head and not reality, but regardless, I am satisfied.

The arts center is a really nice place to get a taste for barre because they allow you to try out your first workout for free. They also offer some reasonable packages.

It is an "arts center," and not a gym, so you have to be prepared for a lot of different things going on at any given time.  I have been a few times, and there are often dozens of 9-year-old ballerinas running around, which can be confusing when you arrive looking for a gym class (I was very confused the first time I went).  Also, I think there is a theater attached.  When I left last week, I am pretty sure I saw a middle-aged woman hotboxing in her car.  I am not sure if she was a dancer, actor, or an exercise enthusiast.  I suppose it does not matter because glaucoma patients are certainly allowed to participate in all of those activities...

Running - I know that seems obvious (October 4, 2014)

I love summer.  However, I am at the age where every summer consists of lots of weddings and wedding activities.  Weddings are amazing for your heart and soul, and probably the consolation prize for no longer being in your early 20s.  You basically get to spend every weekend with friends and family partying and celebrating people you care about who have found happiness.  And even if you are spending the weekend with people you barely know watching two people make a questionable life choice, there is usually cake and a bar, so life isn't too bad.  This leads me to my only complaint about summer - it is hell on your workout regimen.  You are provided with an unlimited amount of high calorie sweets and cocktails, but usually travelling without access to your usual workout, or willpower.

This weekend, I found myself at a gorgeous fall wedding in New York City, watching an amazing and happy couple profess their love for each other...and drinking wine and pounding cupcakes.  I didn't need my Nutrition courses to know that my insides were going to hate me soon.  However, this weekend, I tried to be proactive, so I packed sneakers.

At first, while in my hotel, I looked up spin classes and boot camp classes in the city, and then I realized I was being ridiculous.  I really only needed the sneakers.  I was in a beautiful city on a time crunch.  I decided to run through Central Park.    

I am not a fast runner, but I like running.  I meander along at my 10 minute mile, and I am quite satisfied with that pace. The only exception is when a woman running while pushing two babies in a stroller flies by me.   That hurts a little. Regardless of speed, I know I am getting a great cardiovascular workout, and I can cover just slightly more ground than I can when I am walking.

Running is awesome for a number of reasons.  It is a workout that does not require equipment, and if you feel like doing races, there are always tons happening in cities all over the country on any given weekend.

Additionally, there are running groups in every city. I lived in Richmond briefly, and I attempted joining a running group.  I was never actually able to find them in the park (in hindsight, how was I supposed to know which runners were in the group), but I still get the trusty emails 5 years after I left that city.  Anyhow, that demonstrates one of the nice things about running.  I was still able to run.  Running isn't like tennis.  I can do it alone.   If I showed up to the tennis court, and there was no on the other side of the net, the workout would suck (and I wouldn't be able to play off not finding who I was looking for nearly as well).

This Runner's World link can give you a good idea of how many calories you can burn on a run. http://www.runnersworld.com/tools/calories-burned-calculator

I didn't know where I was going in Central Park, which did not bother me (although it probably bothered the British couple I tried to help with directions), but if you want a more specific route, try www.mapmyrun.com.

I do have to say that running has some disadvantages.  I don't know too many people who haven't had shin splints, stress fractures, runners' knee, or some other joint issue at some point in their running career. That said, I think it is worth it to give it a shot, but know your limits.  If you are just starting to run, perhaps rotate between running and walking and build your speed up slowly.  Or, you can be like me and never particularly go for speed.  See, no excuse to not workout at your next wedding.  Go take those cupcakes to the face.

Vinyasa in the Vineyard (September 28, 2014)

I will start with this post by explaining that I suck at yoga.  If you had told me two years ago that I would take yoga on a sort-of regularly basis, I would have laughed, but a few intervening life events have made me appreciate the workout, even if I am about as bendy as a pretzel rod.  First, like most kids, I dreamed of a big, exciting job…and grew up to spend Monday through Friday sitting at a desk like the majority of Americans.  Sitting 10 to 12 hours a day started to bother my back.  My doctor told me to start doing yoga to keep my hamstrings stretched.  Naturally, I ignored her advice.  A year or so later (with no back improvement), my father was diagnosed with terminal cancer.  I usually would run to relieve stress, but about the same time he was diagnosed with cancer, I was diagnosed with a bad case or runners’ knee.  I could not run for a few months.  My doctor recommended that I do yoga for stress relief.  On an aside, my doctor has more than one suggestion for ailments – she does not suggest yoga for strep throat (that is clearly treated with pilates).  Out of desperation, I started taking yoga classes.  Turns out, it actually is great for your back and stress (and probably a slew of other things).

I remain awful at yoga, but my best friend, Erin, is amazing at yoga (as well as many other things and she just kicks ass at life in general).  She can do a handstand.  If you don’t understand the gravity of how impressive that is, please attempt a handstand right now. 

Erin heard about yoga in a vineyard through her yoga studio in Baltimore.  She goes to Charm City, which I hear is awesome.  I drove north and she drove west on a beautiful Saturday afternoon for Vinyasa in the vineyard.  There are tons of different types of yoga, but it always seems that Vinyasa is what is done in the vineyard.  I suspect it is because alliteration is a good marketing tool.  

Even if you don't like yoga, doing it in a vineyard is a great life choice.  First, the instructors are lovely and patient.  The atmosphere is even more relaxed than a usual yoga class, and they offer lots of variations, one of which is to just sit there and drink your wine (the guy sitting in front of us preferred that option).  

Vinyasa is my favorite type of yoga.  I feel like I get a pretty good workout, even though yoga does not provide the high calorie burn of a traditional cardio workout.  When I do yoga for any consistent period of time, I feel like my arms get more toned and I am generally stronger.  I think this is from all the downward dog, which I can only describe as standing on all fours with your butt up in the air (you look sort of like a human triangle?).  Here is a link with a pretty basic description of Vinyasa since my ass triangle description probably did not do it justice.    http://yoga.about.com/od/typesofyoga/a/vinyasa.htm

I definitely recommend doing yoga in a winery at sunset.  That should be an easy sell even if you never do yoga.  However, I do not suggest making this a weekly workout. One, I believe it is a stretch calling it a workout.  People were able to drink throughout the workout,  If you can drink during your workout, there is a good chance that you are not working out too hard. Additionally, even if you did get a solid workout, it is a little pricey to do on a regular basis.  However, this is because the "workout" is started with a winery tour and followed up with a wine tasting, which includes a ridiculous amount of cheese and other yummy items.  If you are looking for a burning workout, I would steer clear, but I think you could have figured that out from the title of the workout.  If you are looking for a fantastic, relaxing evening with your friend, or if you are only going to do yoga once, I would do Vinyasa in the vineyard.  It was incredibly relaxing, and sometimes that is better for your body than any strenuous workout.

I also have to thank Erin for not pretending not to know me during the yoga workout.  She is definitely a solid yogi, and I am more of a solid cheese eater.  I love you, Coop!

Zumba - the Beer of Exercises (September 22, 2014)

Much like beer, I only partake Zumba a few times a year (I am a wine gal).   Also like beer, Zumba always seems to be easily accessible  (case in point - finding wine at a tailgate is work, but you could probably trip over a mountain of beer).  No matter what time I leave work, or what gym I might try, there is always a Zumba class just about to happen.  It is like magic.  I didn’t feel like running tonight, and of course, there was a Zumba class available. 

For those who don’t know, Zumba is an aerobic class that is usually set to Latin music with some Latin infused dance moves.  As evidenced from my wedding picture, I am pretty confident in my dance moves (those moves seem to involve duck hands).  As seen by my parents double-fist pumping at my wedding, I get these sweet moves honest.

Zumba classes tend to be 55 minutes to an hour. A Google of “calories burned in Zumba,” indicates that you can burn anywhere between 500 to 1000 calories per hour.  This information is useless.  That is like telling you I am between 5’8” and 6’7”. You have learned nothing.  That calorie estimate is also a wildly optimistic.  This link ended up being more useful http://caloriesburnedhq.com/zumba-calories-burned/.  Taking into account my height and weight, the website estimates that I will burn 461 calories in an hour.  That is enough for me to give it a go.

One of the best parts about Zumba is always the instructor’s outfit.  The instructor is always wearing something neon with ZUMBA written across the chest or the ass, lest you forget what class you’re in.  Tonight, the instructor did not disappoint. She was wearing a matching neon Christmas bow on her head, which was perfect, because her borderline inappropriate and over-the-top facial expressions were like a gift to my evening.

 I have no rhythm, but Zumba instructors never care.  They always tell you to just keep moving, which is one of the best aspects of the class.  You will keep moving, which is the point, right?   

Additionally, there are four other things I always experience in Zumba:        

1.  You will be expected to shake your ass (or lack thereof, in my case) in ways you don’t understand.  For example, tonight I was bent over and hopping backwards.  Fantastic workout, and I would never do this anywhere else in the gym...or any other environment.
2.  Follow-up to point number one – there will be one older woman in the class who will be able to flawlessly execute the butt-gyrating exercises.  You will wonder about her day (or late night) job.

      3.   There will also be one person who has no clue what is happening, and he or she will be having a party for one in the back corner. Today, the woman was in the back pretending to fly, and it was awesome.
      4.    A Pitbull song will play.  Not featuring Pitbull, but legit Pitbull.  This is always my favorite part (I’m not proud of it, but I am honest). Fireball!

As mentioned, Zumba is not my go-to work out, but I do smile the entire time.  Additionally, you get a full-body workout because Zumba involves your legs, arms, abs, and of course butt, while doing cardio.  It is also low impact, so it is easy on your joints.  This means people with different levels of physical ability can usually participate. There is no way to get bored between the music and the instructor...and the other participants.  If you have rhythm or enjoy dancing (preferably with duck hands), I recommend the class.  If you’re extremely shy, or get easily embarrassed (I do not - I accepted my awkward a long time ago), then I would bring a friend with you. Strength in numbers - or, party for two in the back if you prefer to pretend you’re flying. You are definitely going to get a decent calorie burn from the non-stop moving and shaking.